Are You a Human Doing or a Human Being?
I’ve come to the end of my to do list. What to do now? Perhaps the larger question is, “Do I have to ‘do’ anything?” What does it mean if I’m NOT doing? What if I were just “being?” We are, after all, called human beings, not human doings.
With so many things coming at us at once these days, especially given our immersion in technology, multi-tasking is becoming more and more prevalent. Worse, we feel it’s necessary. If we have to wait for the slightest moment, out comes the cellphone to check messages, surf Facebook, or make a quick phone call. It seems we can’t stand having nothing to do…or just being alone with ourselves.
There is a significant impact to this. According to neuroscience, the brain cannot multi-task. We have the illusion and experience of multi-tasking, but our brains are actually serially processing those tasks very fast…and not as good as if you had done each task separately while being fully focused on each one. Over time, we become addicted to multi-tasking, and this impacts our ability to focus. (https://brainfodder.org/multi-tasking-doesnt-work/)
I have a good friend who constantly does other things while we are on the phone, whether it’s cooking, crocheting, or conversing with her family. This has been going on for over 40 years. She can’t stand not having her hands busy or trying to accomplish as much as she can in a day. She’s very driven and she can’t stop. I’ve come to accept it.
When did you last pause to look around and be fully present where you are, rather than thinking about the past or the future? According to an article on psychologytoday.com, research conducted by the University of Virginia published in the journal Science suggests that some people are so uncomfortable being alone with their thoughts, they would choose to give themselves mild electric shocks rather than just sit and think! (https://www.psychologytoday.com/gb/blog/the-introverts-corner/201407/would-you-rather-sit-and-think-or-give-yourself-shock),
In a related article (https://www.enchantingmarketing.com/doing-vs-being/), the author, Henneke, goes on to say that doing is easier than being because “doing gives us a sense of control.”
But this is refuted in another article: What is the difference between being and doing? The author, Ido Bar-noam, says that being is easier than doing…which is it for you? (https://medium.com/@idobarnoam/what-is-the-difference-between-being-and-doing-19607ca301be)
Bar-noam defines being and doing:
“Being is a state that takes us back to simple existence. This state is focused inward, and it involves greater awareness of our (selves). (It) is focused on the present moment and allows reflection.”
“Doing involves taking action... It’s outward looking, as it requires us to interact with our environment and other people…to achieve a certain goal. It shifts our focus from ourselves to our surroundings…other people and other elements... It is centered on the future and is driven by thinking.”
What is the impact of always doing, besides eroding our attention and focus? Never taking time to reflect is exhausting. How easily can you shut your monkey mind off at night to sleep? Your brain needs rest also, not just your body.
Bar-noam goes on to say, “The western culture today puts a lot of emphasis on “Doing.” It’s important to keep busy, to be on our way to somewhere and to have a clear agenda…
A constant state of activity creates more wants and needs, and in essence, it is a process that fuels itself, unless checked.”
It’s no wonder that companies today are paying more attention to their employees’ wellbeing, and providing opportunities to slow down, reflect, recharge, and refocus. Employee burnout is spiraling upward as they are asked to do more and more with less resources. In-house mindfulness seminars, meditation and yoga classes, no meeting Wednesdays, and zen gardens to tend at lunch time are some examples of actions that companies have implemented to enhance employee wellbeing, engagement, and retention.
On a personal level, how much time do you take for yourself? Do you find yourself being a slave to your to do list? How much stress does this create? Do you truly listen to what your mind and body need in each moment and respond appropriately?
In essence, there is nothing wrong with doing, as long as it is in balance with being and it is the right thing to be doing in the moment. But here are some distinct benefits of being, summarized, according to Bar-noam:
The benefits of being
1. Makes us see things differently, and focus on the present, which can raise insights that might have been overlooked.
2. Gives us more time than doing because reflection helps us see how to improve the quality of our actions, and how to make ourselves more effective. This also helps in identifying and prioritizing the really important tasks on our to-do list.
3. Easier than doing because it doesn’t require any special knowledge. All we need to do is just let go, and relax, and the rest will come naturally.
4. Uses less energy than doing. When we are in a state of doing, we exert our energy to achieve something. When we are in a state of relaxation, we not only don’t use energy, we receive new energy.
5. Increases our personal development. When we are in a calm reflective state, we get in touch with ourselves. This leads to greater awareness and furthers our (personal) growth.
6. Makes us aware of what’s most important — our life. Constant doing may make us overlook the things that really make us happy.
And I will add one more. “Being,” for example, engaging in mindfulness practices, has multiple health benefits, including increasing your resilience to stress and anxiety, reducing memory loss, decreasing blood pressure, reducing pain, lengthening focus and attention, improving sleep, etc. (https://www.healthline.com/nutrition/12-benefits-of-meditation)
If you are one of those who needs to get off the treadmill and pay more attention to yourself, here are some resources:
https://insighttimer.com/ – This is advertised as the #1 free app for sleep, anxiety, and stress, with many different types of meditations and inspiring, insightful discussions from a wide variety of speakers.
http://calm.com – Also advertised as the #1 app for meditation and sleep, it has a section on improving focus. You can download this app onto your phone if you are so inclined.
https://www.mindful.org/everyday-mindfulness-with-jon-kabat-zinn/ – Jon Kabat-Zinn is a microbiologist who started an eight-week Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction program forty years ago, which has become a worldwide standard for applying mindfulness to the stresses of everyday life and for researching whether mindfulness practice can improve mental and physical health. He is the founder of the Center for Mindfulness in Medicine, Health Care, and Society at UMass Medical School and the author of many books, including Mindfulness for Beginners. This site has many other resources, including mindfulness meditations.
Kabat-Zinn defines mindfulness as an “awareness that arises through paying attention, on purpose, in the present moment, non-judgmentally,” He sometimes adds, “in the service of self-understanding and wisdom.”
There are, of course, many other resources, including focusing techniques. Basically, if you are lost in the weeds (details), try seeing the forest for the trees (big picture), and ask yourself what is this to do list really about, how much of your energy do you want it to take, or what might be better instead. Is it time to do or be? “To be or not to be” – that is the question! The Beatles had an answer: “Let it Be.”